I've felt like I've been existing between worlds for, actually now that I think about it, all my life.

I've always seemed to straddle different cultures, different religions, different ways of thinking about a lot of things. In a way I've always existed outside the box, but tried to pose as being inside so I wouldn't stick out, or as a shy child be embarrassed by being different. The last thing I wanted to do was draw attention to myself. I just wanted to lay low, to be left alone.

I always wished I was one of those eccentric kids who were just blindly themselves, either not aware of their kookiness or just highly evolved and not caring what other people thought. I always had way too much awareness and self consciousness to allow myself to really go there. Too much belief in the status quo kept me entrenched, even thinking it would be selfish to really be authentic. I was very good at faking it too. I think a lot of people are, we're taught, especially as women to be something that puts other people at ease.

But now that I am older it's much easier to embrace the kookiness. And I'm finding that it's a whole lot more interesting and fun on the outside of the box, so many more possibilities to embrace and try on.

So the card tonight is another trance-like intuitive thing where everything just started layering together. I usually do these friday night as a sacred way to end the week. I listen to Robert Ohotto's monday podcast and thursday night shows while I work. He's a brilliant intuitive astrologer who's depth of understanding in the realms of human emotion amazes me. I always come away with some realization about myself or someone I know. His work helps me have more compassion not only for others, but myself too. Check out his work.

And hey if you feel like it, try something wacky this weekend outside your own box. It might awaken something that you didn't even know was there : )